Louis C.K. on shaving his goatee for a role in a new Ricky Gervais film:

Ricky and Matt asked me to shave my beard for the part which was kind of a shock to my system. I have had a goatee beard since I was in my early twenties, so pretty much my whole adult life. So shaving it off and seeing fourty percent of my face for the first time in about twenty years was kind of… awful. “So that’s what’s been going on under there”. Ugh. My chin, and the one behind it, looked like a porn actor’s shaved balls.

I’ve had mine continuously since I was 19. The mustache comes and goes as I feel, making it a Van Dyke some days, and a goatee on others (if you’re in to specifics, though most people just refer to all of them as goatees).

Louis had a pair of balls after shaving his Van Dyke. Does that mean he had a Dick Van Dyke under there all along?